


It's so loud inside my head with words I should've said

by WolfKomoki



Category: Glee, The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Barry Allen is Sebastian Smythe, Gen, Sebastian Smythe is Barry Allen | The Flash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-15 09:48:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11228454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfKomoki/pseuds/WolfKomoki
Summary: When Julian tells Barry about the kid he almost killed, it brings up memories in Barry that he tried to forget a long time ago: the time he lived his life as Sebastian Smythe. As memories come to surface, Barry decides to make it up to everyone that Sebastian had come in contact with.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Who is Julian Albert?](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8459707) by [Angela (angela_tenshi)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angela_tenshi/pseuds/Angela). 



> The Flash is owned by The CW. Glee is owned by Fox.  
> Note: In this fic, Sebastian Smythe and Barry Allen are the same person. Explanations will be inside the fic.

          There was a part of Barry’s past that he didn’t talk about. His past as Sebastian Smythe. When his mother was murdered, and his dad was sent to jail, Joe became his foster father. When he started getting bullied by Tony, Joe transferred him to Dalton Academy, and that’s when he was adopted by the Smythe family. Barry started going by one of his middle names: Sebastian. He wanted a fresh start at the new school, and he couldn’t do that as Barry.

          After he graduated, he stopped going by Sebastian Smythe, and he went back to being Barry Allen after a legal name change. When Barry was Sebastian, he was a terrible person. For one thing, he nearly blinded Blaine with a rock salt slush that was meant for Kurt Hummel. Also, he drove Dave Karofsky to try to kill himself. Knowing that he had almost killed someone was what prompted him to change, to go back to being Barry, and to leave Sebastian behind. Barry had faked liking women for years, until he started going to Dalton. It was there that he decided that he wasn’t going to pretend to be straight anymore.

          When he got back to Central City, though, he pretended to be straight again. Just because Joe is okay with David, his boss being gay, doesn’t mean that he’d be okay with his foster son being gay. What Barry wasn’t expecting, was for Joe to be okay with it. He’d imagined so many scenarios in his head, but the one he didn’t imagine was Joe being okay with it. After all, his new adoptive father had kicked him out after he came out.

“I nearly killed a kid tonight.” Julian states. _I know how that feels._ Barry wants to say, but doesn’t.

          “You did?” He asks.

          “The monster we were chasing, it turns out it was just a hologram, operated by a fifteen-year-old boy. Flash came to save the day. And he saved me from doing something...” Julian’s voice trails off. Barry wishes someone had been there to stop him from driving Karofsky to try to kill himself, maybe he wouldn’t have made so many enemies back in Ohio.

          “I heard about that.” Barry lies.

          “You know what's sad? That kid, he's just acting 'cause he's scared, you know? He wants everyone to be terrified and run away from the monster so he can feel powerful. I know what that's like.” Julian sighs. _So, do I._ Barry wants to say, but doesn’t.

          “How so?” Barry asks.

          “I come from a pretty wealthy family. Back in England. It's a long line of generations of old money, tradition... nonsense, really. And I was the heir. I was their firstborn son.

I was supposed to inherit the lot. But I was the odd duck who would rather go in the garden and collect samples of insects. Rather than learn how to tie a Windsor knot or which fork to use first at dinner. Yeah. No, I wanted more.

You know? I came here to do the one thing that they couldn't stop me from doing. Becoming a scientist... becoming a great scientist. And then just as I got to the top of my field, poof, the world changes overnight. Meta-humans.

I don't know a single thing about meta-humans. I don't know how they talk. I don't know how they walk. I certainly don't know the first thing about stopping them, so... rendered useless. I suppose that's the monster that I'm running from now, just feeling powerless.” Julian growls.

“Yeah, I feel the same way some days, Julian.” Barry admits.

          “How do you mean?” Julian asks, now completely intrigued. He didn’t know that much about Barry, hadn’t really asked. They were just coworkers after all.

          “When I was eleven, my mom was murdered by a metahuman. Of course, no one believed me because there were no metahumans back then, and my dad was put in prison for it. Joe became my foster father, and it was great until I started high school. When I got to high school, well, everyone knew the story of my mom’s murder, and everyone thought that my dad was guilty. So, of course, this kid named Tony started bullying me, and Joe sent me to Dalton, an all-boys boarding school in Ohio to protect me.

When I got there, the state decided that it wasn’t good for me to be alone in a school in another state, and so Joe lost his rights as my foster father. Now because I was a minor, with one parent dead, and another in jail, they decided to put me through the system where I was adopted by the Smythe family. I started going by one of my middle names: Sebastian. I had a new last name, but I was still Barry, so people would know my story, and the bullying would just happen all over again. As Sebastian, I could say, “Oh Barry? Yeah, I don’t know him. Must be a distant relative or something”.

          When I got there, you know, not only was I alone, but I had a new family that I didn’t even know. Also, I was in the closet. I didn’t know how Joe would react, and I certainly didn’t know how Richard would react, so I was in the closet until I was enrolled in Dalton. I was in a new state, away from anyone back home so I really didn’t care about staying in the closet.

          The only problem, was that I became condescending, forward, snarky, cocky, and unapologetic. I met this guy named Blaine, and I had a crush on him. Of course, I then met his boyfriend Kurt, and instead of doing what a sane person would do and back off, I became jealous, and in my jealously I put rock salt in a slushy and threw it in his face, which nearly blinded him. I tried to justify it by saying that the slush was meant for Kurt, but how can you justify almost permanently blinding someone?

          I didn’t stop there, oh no, I didn’t stop there. There was this kid called David Karofsky, well not only did I fat shame him, I was also homophobic towards him. I tried to justify it by saying that it was because I was still in the closet, but everyone knows that was a lie. Everyone knew that I was gay. You want to know what the worst part about that was?” Barry asks.

          “What?” Julian asks. It was obvious that Barry hated himself for what he did in high school. Hell, Julian hated himself now, but still, he wanted to know about Barry’s past, so he listens.

          “He tried to kill himself, because of me. I live every day knowing that, if he had succeeded, that he would be dead because of me.” Barry growls.

          “Jesus. Is there no way that you can contact him?” Julian asks.

          “To be honest, I haven’t tried. I mean, sorry just doesn’t cut it, you know?” Barry answers.

          “Still, if it were me, it would be nice to hear.” Julian admits.

          “Maybe so, either way, I know that if my dad were still alive, that he’d be ashamed of me.” Barry sighs.

 

 

 

            
  


 

  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

          “I don’t think so. I think he’d be proud of what you’ve accomplished.” Julian tells him.

          “You know, I had finally accomplished what I’d always wanted to do as a kid, which was proving his innocence, and then he was murdered by another metahuman. You want to know the worst part?” Barry asks.

          “What?” Julian asks.

          “The metahuman that murdered him? I thought that he was my friend. He pretended to be my friend for months, and then he turns around and kills my dad.” Barry answers.

          “Jesus.” Julian mutters. Sebastian may have been a dick, but he was smart. If Barry had never stopped being Sebastian, then he wouldn’t have gotten so close to the fake Jay Garrick in the first place. Sebastian, would have seen right through him, but Barry, well Barry was trusting, a little too trusting. It was at this point, that Barry starts packing his things. Julian had told him to get out, so he was going to.

          “You can stop. You can _stay_.” Julian states. Barry froze at that statement. Didn’t Julian want him gone? He had said that not even a _day_ ago.

          “I was really wrong about The Flash, so I could be wrong about you too.” Julian states.

          “Don’t leave.” Julian pleads.

          “Don’t worry, I’m not quitting. I’ll be back, but first I have to undo some damage.” Barry tells him, packing up his stuff as he leaves the building. He gets home within seconds, and that’s when he makes a list of the people that he needed to make it up to. Blaine, Kurt, Karofsky, Rachel. He can’t make it up to Finn, but he can make it up to the rest of them. The only problem? He has no idea of where any of them are now. So, he would have to search for them. Barry knows the basics of finding people thanks to his work with Star Labs, so he could do this on his own. Barry decides to buy a cheap laptop, not wanting his main laptop to have the evidence that he’d been searching through records he shouldn’t have access to when he was looking for these people. Of course, anyone could look at his IP address so, once he found them, he’d have to toss the laptop.

         

          When Barry gets home, he goes into his room, and closes the door as he sets up the laptop. It took about ten minutes to create an account and hook up to the wifi, so he started looking through local police records in Ohio. Barry had never considered himself a hacker before, but there was a kind of thrill of looking through police records that he didn’t have access to. He understands Felicity a little bit more now that he’s the one hacking something. When Barry sees that Rachel was a Broadway actress now, he was impressed. He frowns, though when he realizes something: she’s an actress now, getting close to her without her having guards on him was going to be tough.

         

          Sighing, he looks for Blaine next. He was also a Broadway Actor, but at least Barry had an address. He would have to go to New York to find it, but it’s something at least. He finds Kurt next. Kurt was an actor too? What the hell? Also, he lived in New York too, so that’s something. Finding Dave however, was a bit difficult. There were three different addresses listed in Ohio, and it doesn’t say which one of them were current. Well, he guessed he’ll just have to check them all out until he finds the right one.

For now, though? He needs plane tickets. He doubts that he could just run to New York, or Ohio. He’s never ran to another state before, although, wouldn’t another Earth be sort of the same thing? Whatever, Barry didn’t risk it.

         

          What he wasn’t expecting, however, was to receive messages from Richard Smythe on his old Facebook account when he was still Sebastian Smythe. Barry hadn’t really done anything with the account, just left it there after the legal name change. He never really had a reason to use the account until just now, his past as Sebastian was just that: his past, at least until now.

          “Sebastian, you haven’t been seen in Ohio for three years. I checked your account, but it says that the last post was posted in 2013? Please tell me that you’re alright.” The message reads. Barry was confused. Why did he care now, after all these years? Frowning, he continues reading the messages.

          “Sebastian, I’m sorry. I never should have kicked you out. I’ve reinstated your access to the Smythe family funds. Please, just talk to me.” Another message reads.

          “Sebastian, please. You’re scaring me. If you don’t respond soon, I’m going to file a mission person’s report.” Another message reads. Barry’s eyes widened. He was going to file a missing person’s report? Did that ever go through?

          “Alright Sebastian, you leave me no choice: I’ve filed a missing person’s report. Please be okay.” Another message reads. Barry’s eyes widened. Does everyone think that he’s missing? Oh God, the Warblers must be worried.

          “Sebastian, it’s been one year since you went missing. I know this is futile at this point, messaging your account hoping that you would answer me back one day, but that hope is all I have left. Please son, come back to me.” The message reads. Barry feels a pang in his chest. Richard still considers him a son?

          “Sebastian, it’s been, hard not knowing where you are, or if you’re even okay. I… I can’t help but think that I’m at fault for this. Please son, if you’re reading this somehow, just please. Let me know you’re okay.” Another message reads.

          “I’m starting to give up hope Seb. People are telling me that if you haven’t been found by now, that you might be dead. I don’t want to believe them, but you’ve given me no sign. Please son, prove them wrong, I’m begging you.” Another message reads. Barry reads another message.

          “I held a memorial for you today Sebastian. I didn’t want to give up hope, but I need to let you go. I’m going to give you one last chance to prove me wrong, to prove that you’re not dead. I’ll be waiting for you son. I love you.” Barry started sobbing after reading that. Barry decides to send him a message, hoping that he was still checking this account after a while. He decides to update his profile picture with a more modern picture, and to add Barry Allen under other names.

          “Hi dad. I live in Missouri now, in a town called Central City. If you would like to visit me, I can send you my address. I’m sorry for making you worry so much.” He sends.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  


  


 

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

         Barry decides to run to New York anyway. He'd packed a bag with enough essentials for two days, as he knew that he wouldn't be able to carry an entire set of luggage while running. Turns out he can run to other states, so long as he made sure to eat along the way. At least Blaine and Kurt lived together, so they were easy to track down. Before he headed to their home, however, Barry needed some fuel, and so he decided to go for pizza. He'd always heard that you haven't lived until you tried New York pizza, so he decided to test that theory. Barry chuckled when he sees the look on the staff's face when he orders enough for three people. Soon enough, they brought the pizza to him, and that's when he bites into it. They weren't kidding, this was the best pizza he'd ever had. After paying for his meal, Barry decides to run to Blaine and Kurt's home. He stared at the time, it was lunch time, so hopefully Blaine and Kurt were inside. He didn't know what he would do if they weren't. Slowly, Barry knocked on the door, hoping that they would answer.

         Blaine was startled out of a dead sleep when he heard someone knocking on the door. Ever since Sebastian went missing back in 2013, he and Kurt have been worried sick. It's been what, three years since he went missing? Yet no one has been able to find him. It was like he'd fallen off the face of the Earth. Yawning, Blaine walks to the door, and looks at the peephole. Blaine's eyes widened when he sees Sebastian standing outside. Blaine opens the door after that and runs outside. When Barry sees Blaine come outside, he expected him to hit him, or shove him. What he wasn't expecting was for him to start sobbing.

         "You _asshole_! You had me worried sick and-holy fucking shit _you're on fire_!" Blaine shouts, running inside to get a fire extinguisher. When he comes back, Barry snorts when he sprays him with it. Well, that's one way to reunite with someone. Eventually he cracks up.

         "Why are you laughing? You were just on fire!" Blaine asks.

         "It's fine, it happens sometimes." Barry laughs.

         "What the hell do you mean it happens sometimes? You were on fire!" Blaine shouts.

         "I'm aware of that Blaine" He says. He laughs.

         "Hell of a way to reunite with someone." Barry jokes.

         "Uh-uh. You don't get to do that. You don't get to joke after you go missing for three years and then just show up here out of the blue." Blaine snaps. Barry sighs.

         "I'm sorry, okay? For all of it." Barry apologizes. If he had just pulled his head out of his ass back then, maybe he wouldn't have made so many enemies back in Ohio.

Blaine's eyes widened upon realizing that he was still beating himself up over what he'd done in high school.

"Christ Sebastian, that was _high school_. We were teenagers. I forgave you a long time ago." He says. Barry winced.

"My name isn't Sebastian Smythe, it's Barry Allen." He says as he looks at the ground. Blaine looked at his friend with a frown. Sebastian-no Barry, was so much different than the Sebastian-or Barry rather-that he had known in high school. Gone was the condescending, forward, cocky, and unapologetic person that he had come to know.

_It's so loud inside my head with words that I should've said_

_As I drown in my regrets_

_I can't take back the words I never said_

_I never said_

_I can't take back the words I never said_

         "Look at me." Blaine insists. Slowly, Barry looks up.

         " _I forgive you_ , okay? We were teenagers, stupid, hormonal, jealous teenagers. That shit was in the past." Blaine says, trying to get through to Sebastian-Barry damn it. Yeah, he's going to struggle with that one. Barry looks at him.

"No! You can't just _forgive_ me that easily! That's _not_ how this works!" He shouts. Blaine sighs and pulls him in for a hug.

" _Stop it_. It's okay." He pleads. What he wasn't expecting was for Barry to start sobbing against his chest. He sighs and pats the older man's back. In the three years that he was missing, Blaine had prayed to whoever would listen to please, _please_ let his friend be okay, and to please, _please_ let him tell him that he forgives him.

"Come on, stop, it's okay. Don't cry." Blaine pleads. Eventually Barry stops crying, and that's when he wipes away his tears.

"Oh Kurt is going to be so relieved to see you! Come inside!" Blaine insists. Barry nods as he goes inside and sits on the couch.

         "Well, you're probably hungry after coming here. I have some pasta in the fridge if you want some." Blaine offers.

         "Thanks. By the way I eat like a shit ton of food, so you'll have to give me a lot." Barry informs. Blaine chuckles.

         "Okay, man." He says as he goes to get the food. He's so relieved that his friend is okay. When Blaine brings him the food, he ends up giving him two plates worth of pasta. Grinning, Barry bites into the food, and that's when his mouth waters.

"Holy shit this is good. Did you _make this_?" He asks. Blaine chuckles.

         "I wish. This is from a restaurant." He answers. Barry chuckles.

         "Well, I'll have to check it out sometime." He says. He'd already scarfed the food down in minutes, which Blaine can't lie, he finds amusing.

"Jesus Barry you'd think you'd been on a desert or something." He chuckles.

"Or something." Barry laughs. It was strange hearing Blaine call him by his real name, but it was better than being reminded of his past.

"Seriously man, you scared us all to death. Where have you _been_ the past three years?" Blaine asks. Barry sighs.

"I was born in Central City, Missouri." He starts to explain.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I mentioned this, but Barry is a lot younger in this fic. In this fic he was born in 1995, not 1989. In order for his age to match up as "Sebastian Smythe" some changes had to be made, otherwise he would have been twenty-two years old on November 8th, 2011 when he was first introduced. So that means that in 2016, when this fic takes place, Barry is twenty-one years old.

         “When I was eleven, my mom was murdered. The official story is that my dad just snapped one day and stabbed my mother in the heart. The unofficial story? Yellow lightning came in through the windows that night, and a man in a yellow suit killed my mom, not my dad. At first everyone thought that I was a kid trying to cover for his father, until they realized that I believed the things that I saw. When they realized that, I was put into the foster care system. They figured that if someone adopted me, then living somewhere else                                                   would finally get me to see the truth. That was when Joe took me in. He couldn’t bear to see me be taken away, so he took me in.

         When I was in high school, I was being bullied by this kid Tony. One day he beat me up so bad that I ended up in the hospital my Freshman year of high school, and that was when Joe transferred me to Dalton Academy. Now, because I was a minor that was living in another state, and had a dad in prison, Joe lost custody. It was then that I was put into the foster care system, and was adopted by the Smythe family.

         As you know, Richard Smythe is a States Attorney. What you don’t know, is that he had a wife named Charlotte Dupuis-Smythe. Charlotte was born in Paris, but moved to America when she was in her twenties. Eventually she became a citizen. Years later she meets Richard Smythe and they got married. What you also don’t know, is that Richard is an abusive, alcoholic homophobe. Charlotte finally worked up the courage to divorce him a year later, and she went back to Paris. I started going by one of my middle names when I was adopted. I knew that Dalton had a no tolerance bullying policy, but when you had the shit beat out of you for your real name, well I decided to go by an alias. In my Freshman year, I had a boyfriend when I lived in Paris, and naturally Richard found out. Richard lost his shit.

         When I came home for the holiday my junior year, he called me a fag and told me that I was no longer his son. He also told me to get the fuck out of his house, which means that I had been disowned that day. Now, because I was seventeen, having returned to the states, was enrolled in Dalton Academy, and couldn’t get a parent to sign the papers, I couldn’t get a job. So, I started recycling cans to get enough money to pay the payments at Dalton. After I graduated, I stopped going by Sebastian Smythe. I went to court to get my name legally changed back to Barry Allen. Soon it was approved. I returned to Central City after that, which is when I went to college to become a CSI. I was eighteen at the time, but as part of my schooling, the college agreed to let me become a forensics assistant. On the night of December 11, 2013, a particle accelerator went off.

         It was meant to provide clean energy to the city, and advance science and medicine, but when they turned it on, something went horribly wrong. That night I was working a late shift in my lab, when I felt the explosion shake the building. I ran over to the chain of the skylight, trying to close it before I got hit by the explosion, but lightning came through the skylight which knocked me back against the chemical rack. Not only had I been doused with chemicals, but I was struck by lightning to boot. I was in a coma for nine months after that, and when I woke up, I found that I could run at the speed of light. I finally freed my father from prison in 2015, and then on May 17th, 2016 my father was murdered. I hated the man that killed him. On that day, I could’ve killed him, hell I wanted to, but I didn’t.

         Of course, instead of realizing that, my so-called family and friends locked me in a cell when I was grieving. When I eventually got out, I showed them that I was never going to kill that man. However, in order to defeat the speedster known as Zoom, I had to go back in time and convince my younger self to help me power a magnatar that Zoom created. What I didn’t know was that my younger self sacrificed himself, or at least that’s what I was led to believe. Once he was defeated, I couldn’t take my dad being dead, so I ran back to the day that my mom was murdered, and I stopped the Reverse Flash, which was the man in yellow, from killing her.

         In doing so, I created an alternate timeline I dubbed Flashpoint where I lived for three months. The timeline was great until I started losing my memories. It was then that I had to go back in time to the day that she died again, but this time I had to ask the man that killed her to kill her again. When I woke up I thought I was back in my original timeline, but I quickly realized that I was living in yet another timeline.

         In this new timeline, Joe and his daughter Iris were estranged after she found out that her mother Francine never died. My friend Cisco Ramon’s brother Dante was killed by a drunk driver. My friend Caitlin Snow became a metahuman with Cryokinesis. Star Labs, the place where I worked as the Flash, now had a speed lab. Everyone at Star Labs now had panic buttons on their phones. John Diggle, another friend of mine, used to have a daughter named Sara Diggle, who, was named to honor Sara Lance. Now however, he had a son: John Diggle Jr.

         I also discovered that I had a work mate named Julian Albert who had worked there for a year. Later I found out that my time remnant survived, and is calling himself Savitar, the God of Speed.” Barry explains. Blaine blinks.

         “Hold the phone! You’re telling me that you’re the Flash? Seriously?” He asks. Barry cracks up.

         “Seriously.” He laughs.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in the show Barry didn't know who Savitar was at this point, but I'm sorry. Barry isn't stupid. He would've figured that out way sooner than he did if the writers didn't make him out to be such an idiot. If he was able to create Gideon, then I'm sorry, but he would have figured out Savitar's identity way sooner than he did.


	5. Chapter 5

                  Barry runs to Lima two days later, sighing with relief that Blaine and Kurt forgave him for his actions as Sebastian. Now it was his turn to get in contact with Dave. He’d never really forgiven himself for causing Dave to try to take his own life. It was that moment that sparked something in him: determination. Barry was determined to never let Sebastian rear his ugly head ever again. Now that he was in Ohio, he has a job to do: find David Karofsky. The first address was a tiny apartment located in the lower end of town.

         Barry slowly knocked on the door, not sure what he’d find after having done that. Barry frowns when he sees an elderly man step outside of the apartment. This couldn’t be the right address.

         “Yes? May I help you, young man?” The man asks.      

         “I’m sorry, I must have the wrong address. I’m looking for someone named David Karofsky?” Barry asks.

         “I’ve never heard of him, I’m sorry son.” The man informs.

         “Thank you anyway.” Barry says as he goes to the next address. When he gets to the next address, he slowly knocks on the door. When he’s standing there for ten minutes he was about ready to give up until he hears a familiar voice coming from the other end of the door.

         “Sebastian?” A surprised voice asks. Barry didn’t even need to see Dave walking outside to confirm that he’d found the right address.

         “Hey Dave.” Barry greets, slowly waving at him. Barry’s eyes widened when Dave punched him as hard as he could.

         “Okay, I deserved that.” Barry says as he gets up from the ground. Dave frowns. What the hell was he thinking, punching him like that?

         “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have reacted like that. Come inside.” He insists. Barry stares at him in confusion.

         “Huh?” He asks.

         “You’re gonna get a black eye if you don’t let me take care of that, come on.” Dave insists. Barry shrugs and walks inside as Dave gets the peas out of the freezer. After handing them to Sebastian, Barry puts the peas on his left eye.

         “Sorry about, you know, hitting you.” Dave apologizes.

         “Wouldn’t be the first time I got hit.” Barry shrugs. Dave frowns.

         “So, where have you _been_ all this time? The papers said you were missing.” He asks.

         “My... Uh… real name is Bartholomew Henry Barry, Sebastian, Allen, though I prefer to go by Barry.” Barry says.

         “Okay, so why the name change?” Dave asks.

         “When I was eleven, my mom was murdered. The official story is that my dad just snapped one day and stabbed my mother in the heart. The unofficial story? Yellow lightning came in through the windows that night, and a man in a yellow suit killed my mom, not my dad.

At first everyone thought that I was a kid trying to cover for his father, until they realized that I believed the things that I saw. When they realized that, I was put into the foster care system. They figured that if someone adopted me, then living somewhere else would finally get me to see the truth. That was when Joe took me in. He couldn’t bear to see me be taken away, so he took me in.” He starts to explain. Dave frowns.

         “Your mom was murdered?” He asks.

         “Yeah. She was.” Barry says.

         “So… what led to the name change?” Dave asks again.

         “When I was in high school, I was being bullied by this kid Tony. One day he beat me up so bad that I ended up in the hospital my Freshman year of high school, and that was when Joe transferred me to Dalton Academy. Now, because I was a minor that was living in another state, and had a dad in prison, Joe lost custody. It was then that I was put into the foster care system and was adopted by the Smythe family.

         As you know, Richard Smythe is a States Attorney. What you don’t know, is that he had a wife named Charlotte Dupuis-Smythe. Charlotte was born in Paris but moved to America when she was in her twenties. Eventually she became a citizen. Years later she meets Richard Smythe and they got married. What you also don’t know, is that Richard is an abusive, alcoholic homophobe. Charlotte finally worked up the courage to divorce him a year later, and she went back to Paris. I started going by one of my middle names when I was adopted. I knew that Dalton had a no tolerance bullying policy, but when you had the shit beat out of you for your real name, well I decided to go by an alias.” Barry recalls.

         “So, what lead up to you ending up in Paris, if you don’t mind my asking?” Dave asks.

         “Richard’s abuse became so bad when I visited Paris for the holidays my Freshman year Charlotte let me live with her in Paris my Freshman year for my own safety.” Barry answers. Dave nods.

         “In my Freshman year, I had a boyfriend when I lived in Paris, and naturally Richard found out. Richard lost his shit. When I came home for the holiday my junior year, he called me a fag and told me that I was no longer his son.

He also told me to get the fuck out of his house, which means that I had been disowned that day. Now, because I was seventeen, having returned to the states, was enrolled in Dalton Academy, and couldn’t get a parent to sign the papers, I couldn’t get a job. So, I started recycling cans to get enough money to pay the payments at Dalton.

After I graduated, I stopped going by Sebastian Smythe. I went to court to get my name legally changed back to Barry Allen. Soon it was approved. I returned to Central City after that, which is when I went to college to become a CSI. I was eighteen at the time, but as part of my schooling, the college agreed to let me become a forensics assistant.” Barry recalls.

 

 

 

        

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly though, Barry and Sebastian not being twins in this fanfic makes the timeline _very_ confusing.


End file.
